Twenty and five
by hanafuda
Summary: If ABC can do a 25 Days of Christmas thing, then anyone can. So this is a Christmas fanfic with daily updates! It'll be tough, but I'll do my best to make sure these chapters don't suck! Rated T for language, because I can't write without it.
1. Decorations from Yiwu

Here approached a Santa. It wasn't common to find a person in Claus's garb, not wearing a white beard but instead a natural ponytail -

No, it was just China in a Santa suit. He hit the doorbell of a house, and a bell version of… gee, he didn't know the name. Did it matter?

"Big brother!"

"Little brother!"

"What brings you here? What's in those boxes?"

"Your Christmas decorations, remember?"

"… I'm sorry, I'm old and I continue to forget."

"It's all right. I almost forgot to give anyone anything last year, so… here you are! Would you like some help decorating?"

"… that would be nice." Japan smiled warmly. Maybe the two were jerks to each other every other time of year, but… they were still brothers, who loved each other very much.

"Okay!" China set the boxes down and opened them with an X-Acto knife. He began to take out everything imaginable, from ornaments to candles to lights… to a new tree. Maybe it was fake - God knows Chinese water wouldn't help a tree live - but it was still a nice one.

"So, these are all Chinese-made?"

"Of course they are!" Of course, by that, he also meant made in Hong Kong and Macau. At least, parts of some of them were. But anyways -

"Let's go!"

"Right!" Japan nodded and began to set up the tree while unpacked the ornaments and lights and stuff. And then the two began to put them on the tree.

"… we're not tall, are we?" They'd not decorated half of the tree before finding that the other half was too high for them.

"I'll grab the ladder." Japan retreated to his garage and returned with the ladder. China stepped atop and finished decorating

before falling off. His brother reacted quickly and caught him.

"Oof!"

"Be more careful, won't you?"

"Y-yeah… thanks. Now put me down."

"Okay. Phew!" China was heavy, so Japan gladly set him down.

"… what next?"

"We have some candles, and… candles."

"I like candles."

So they put them around the house.

"… I think that's it."

"Seems that way. How about some tea?"

"Sure."

While Japan was in the kitchen, China sat at the couch, leaning forward and thinking.

"Something on your mind?" Japan asked, almost as if he'd been reading his mind, while he came back with some cups of tea.

"… you're being so kind, you know?"

"Of course I am."

"Even though I can be a jerk, some times?'

"…" He nodded sheepishly. "I haven't treated you very well, either, and I'm sorry."

"Hey. I should be apologizing."

"Don't worry about that, China."

"… all right."

"Come here." Japan pat the seat next to him, so China stood and sat there, next to him.

"You're my brother, China, right?"

"You still think so?"

"I always have. …"

"…" He looked down and nodded. "I suppose we are."

"That makes me glad."

"That's good."

Japan hugged him gently. "I love you."

China blushed. "… e-erm, I love you too. You're not the kind of person to say such things. A-are you all right, Japan?"

"Of course I am. What did I say?"

"You love me."

Japan flushed. "My, I must be old, my memory is shaky…"

"So is mine, calm down."

"Don't you have other houses to visit?"

"SHIIIIIIIT!" China jumped and ran out. "See you!"

Japan sheepishly waved.

* * *

 **And there's Day 1 of this stuffs! I hope this gets better, this chapter is clearly rushed and cheesy and shit -3-**


	2. The Uralic Club!

"Is everyone here?"

"I believe if you count, yes, we are all here."

"I'm here, I think that's it!"

"Ah... to think, most of our lives, we're lonely, but when we meet together like this, it's real nice."

Estonia sipped his tea.

"Why is it we're drinking hot chocolate and you're drinking tea?" Finland wondered.

"I know I can't live without coffee," Hungary mused.

"Well, I suppose... I don't know, to be honest. My whole life is a mystery. Anyways, remind me why we're meeting today?"

"We have to discuss our Christmas plans, silly!"

"... oh." He took another sip.

"Let me guess, Finland, you're going to make another weird Santa lore movie?"

"How did you know?"

"... a hunch." Hungary drank some more coffee. "Well, all I know is, on Monday night, I am going to leave a boot at my window, and Szent Miklós will come and fill it with treats at night!"

"If Krampusz doesn't give you an onion instead," Finland joked.

"I'm sorry, what?" Her eyes twitched as she stared coldly at him.

"I-it's only a joke, Miss Hungary!" He shivered in fear and looked away.

"So I hope."

"What else are you going to do, Finland?"

"Well, I already have my Advent calendar and annoying radio advertisements in Finnish and Swedish... I think I'll go visit Sweden and shop with him at IKEA!"

"... of course. Anyways, this year, I have to dress up as Santa..."

"Oh, really? I bet you'd look really cute dressed as him!" Hungary giggled.

"S-sure." He flushed and covered his face with his hand. "Oh, and, Latvia and Lithuania agreed to dress as elves to give little children candy in their slippers that they leave out at night, so, it's not all that bad."

"Lucky... Austria wouldn't agree to something like that, nowadays..."

"Maybe Sweden would." _Weird._

"..."

"Well. This is awkward."

"Hey, did any of you receive invitations from America?"

"He's hosting this year's Christmas party?"

"Yep."

"Oh, boy..."

"Well, we have three more weeks to decide what to bring... so many presents to buy already..."

"I think I'll buy Austria... a new piano? Nem... umm..."

"I think Sweden would appreciate... just some chocolate, maybe."

"Latvia and Lithuania... geez... what do they like?"

"I think Latvia likes chess. Oh, and, Lithuania is insane at basketball."

"True, true."

"These meetings never go anywhere."

"Yeah, but, if everyone was here, someone would have been thrown out the window by now."

"True."

"..."

"Group hug time!"

"Hmm?"

Hungary tackled the other two into the floor, squeezing them tightly together.

* * *

 **So now you might just live the rest of your days, never knowing what happened to Estonia and Finland. X)**


	3. Shopping is fun

Sweden would never understand electronic, automatic doors. But that didn't matter. Here he was, in the world's second largest IKEA - he still didn't understand how South Korea had a larger one - ready to shop. For everyone he knew.

 _America needs a coffee table. So do England, Italy, Russia, Australia, Vietnam, India - does he drink coffee? I'll get to him later._

He wrote the stuff down.

 _Spain needs a rocking chair. Why, I don't know. France could use a new bed. It perplexes me. Why does he need a twin? All he needs is a king. Geez._

His journey through the store brought him to the best part of the place.

No, not Småland. The food court. Loads of food stuff went into the cart. He figured, along with all of his furniture gifts, his fellow nations would appreciate standard-issue goodie bags.

 _Which means I need to buy Lördagsgodis for everyone. Wonderful_.

Meanwhile, in America… There goes the other bespectacled blonde, pushing multiple carts all throughout the store, stuffing everything he deemed giftable in, all while scanning each one with Cartwheel and adding the coupons in.

Meanwhile, in England… "Why are donuts so expensive? No wonder De Gea nicked one."

Meanwhile, in China… "Let's keep those ornaments coming, peeps!" Oh, Yiwu.

Meanwhile, in Japan… "This is the first time I've ever seen The iDOLM STER: One for All on sale. And this came out years ago."

* * *

 **Half-assed insert at 11 PM PST is half-assed. Tomorrow? Some hot guy dresses up as Santa. Yay. Also, I might just edit this one so it doesn't suck.**


	4. Père Noël au centre commercial

"Are you sure they won't recognize me?"

"Oui, as long as you try to hold back that accent of yours and don't go on 'Big brother' and romantic tangents. Remember what happened last time?"

"Oui, it went normal. Stop trying to make the author write exposition."

"... right."

France put on his Santa hat and was unrecognizable. No flashy blue cape and red pants or blonde hair or goatee - no, it's a fuzz - what the fuck is that? - did you steal some of Gordon Freeman's? - oh, whatever. Instead, here sat, on a green chair surrounded by empty boxes wrapped in paper adorned by cartoon snowmen and candy canes, a modestly-sized man in a red outfit, donning a nice white beard and wearing a red hat with white...

*sigh*. I need to do more research.

But it wasn't [necessarily] Santa. Deep down, we all knew it was still France.

Who are we?

The curtain was open, and the children cheered as the store peeps and mothers and fathers kept them from rushing and storming the poor guy.

Up went the first child, onto Santa's lap.

"Bonjour, mon ami, how are you?"

"Fantastique!"

So far, so good.

"C'est bien. Have you been nice this year?"

"Of course!"

"I can tell if you're lying."

The child blushed.

"I know you're telling the truth, honhon~."

He sighed in relief.

"What would you like for breakfast-"

Fuck.

"- er, honhon, Christmas this year?"

"Hmm... I've been thinking, and, if I could have one thing, it would be a... 3DS."

"Why's that?"

"That Smash Bros. game or whatever looks sick!"

"C'est vrai."

"Will you come through for me this year, Santa?"

"Of course, mon ami! When have I let you down?"

"You gave me coal last year."

Santa looked up at the parent's mother. "Non, I-I didn't. Umm..."

She shrugged.

"... it was your mother, wasn't it."

"Oui."

"Hey... it was a joke."

"Barely funny."

"Mon ami. I promise your stocking will have a Nintendo box in it this year."

"Oh! Wait! Tuesday is your feast day, oui?"

"C'est vrai."

"How about you put it into the boot I leave on my windowsill tomorrow evening?"

"If the boot is polished and you behave well enough tomorrow..."

"Merci, Santa!" The child hugged him tight.

"Say 'fromage'!" said the camerawoman.

"Fromage!"

Click.

* * *

Two hours later.

"Ma rose, if he's not treating you well, I have an idea..."

* * *

 _Five hours later..._

Knock knock.

An annoyed teen opened the door. "Que veux-tu?"

"Jusqu'à ton cul, chienne, morceau de merde!" Santa punched him in the face and ran off. "Joyeux Noël, fils de pute!"

* * *

"And that was all I wanted for Christmas. Jacques doesn't bother me anymore. Merci beaucoup, Santa." The girl kissed his cheek.

Santa's cheeks went redder than usual. "Honhonhon..."

* * *

 **Don't translate that.**


	5. Eve

"Poland, it's the third time I've called you. What were you doing?"

"Liet~! I was, like, dressing up as St. Nick, so calm yourself, okay?"

"Oh... okay."

"Aren't you going to, too, Liet?"

"Taip... but I called you to say, I think they mixed up our costume sizes.

Again."

"Really? I didn't notice."

"Does your belt fit down to the last hole?"

"Yeah."

"Yeah. Exactly." He sighed and facepalmed. "Come over here so we can solve this. Bring the box and shit."

"Why do I need the box?"

"Sorry, I'm thinking about boxes. I like boxes."

"... okay."

So Poland went to Lithuania's house and exchanged the costume for the larger one.

"What are your rules this year, again?"

"If the shoe is not polished, or it's dirty or something, it's getting onions and coal. Not fun, but that's how it goes."

Lithuania nodded sheepishly. "It's almost sundown. We should get going. You, especially, you need to get back."

"I'll have time."

"Last time you said that, Gdansk was forgotten."

"Pfft. Germany saved me at the last minute!"

"... yeah." He put on his hat and went out. "Where should I go first? Kaunas?"

"Do whatever, man."

"..." He nodded and disappeared into the night.

Poland began driving around in an old FIAT 500. I knew he had taste.

He checked all of the windowsills. Sure enough, it seemed every one had at least one shoe. He put candy canes and Euro coins in each one.

Lithuania, meanwhile, chanced upon an old, dirt-covered Vans shoe. He stuffed it with coal, but hid a few Euro notes underneath in a small box. Nobody could tell unless they took out the coal.

Poland looked back and saw some teens - fucking rowdy, mischievous teens - trying to steal out of the shoes he had filled. There was only one option.

"Like, say good night, fucks!" He tranquilized each one.

"I bet the others are having a better time than I am." America was busy cleaning out a shoe filled with... brown stuff. Lovely.

* * *

 **I suppose these will be progressively longer as the days count down. Tomorrow should be long, it is St. Nicholas Day, after all.**


	6. Jolly Old St Nick

"SHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII"

"Calm down, what's wrong, bro?"

"I forgot to leave out my shoe, FUCK!"

"What are you talking about?"

"St. Nick's Day, dude! DUH? Didn't you remember?"

"I did! So I left you a shoe out as well!"

"... you did?" America's eyes glimmered.

"Yep." Canada nodded. "Just peek outside, eh?"

He did as he was told and found himself in shock. Two shoes filled with candy canes and chocolate. "WHOA!" He picked them up and ran in, giving Canada one of the shoes. "This is sick, bro!"

"Really." Canada took out the contents with a smile. "Whoa, they even gave us a few bucks! Neat."

"Thanks for remembering me, bro!" America hugged him tightly.

"N-no problem, America."

"Wasn't my shoe out there?" Kuma wondered as he walked into the kitchen, rubbing his eyes.

"Go check, eh?"

"Nah. CBA." He plopped down on the floor. "You go get it, Canadiana."

"Canada."

"Sure."

Tony walked outside and pulled his shoe inside. "I didn't see your shoe, you filthy macadamia shit bag."

"That's a new one," America mused.

* * *

"Fratello!"

"Mmph."

"Fratello~!"

"I'm trying to sleep, you bastard."

"St. Nick came!"

"WHAT?" He jumped out of bed and gapped it outside. His boot was filled with pizza and Euro notes.

"SANTA MERDA!"

Italy looked at Romano, wondering if what he said made sense. "Well, now, I have high hopes for Christmas!"

"EUROS!" Romano rubbed them on his face, happy to have some for once.

* * *

 **-3-; this sucks**


	7. Eight? Seven?

"Hey! You've come to visit me for once!"

"And I'll be going."

"WHAT?" Denmark's eyes widened.

"Only joking." Norway shook his head. "I just wanted to see if you wished to look at the Aurora borealis with me."

"What?" His eyes twinkled. "I'm so honored!"

"Never mind."

"Aw."

"You're so gullible, you know that?" Norway chuckled.

"Meanie." Denmark pouted. "Are the others coming with you?"

"Yep!" Finland waved.

Sweden and Iceland nodded as they peeked through the door.

"Oh. Okay. Why your place and not Icey's?"

"It would be a ballsuck to see you guys take over my house again."

"Don't you have an active volcano in your backyard?"

"I do. I covered it in this glass sheet though. It works in Minecraft and I'm certain it'll keep it from erupting into my room while I'm asleep."

"..."

"Let's roll."

One ferry later.

"Whoa..."

"And we're done."

"What?"

"I said, we're done."

"We just got here!"

"And?"

"Why are we leaving already?"

"We're not."

"Why not?"

"You want to go?"

"No, I... oh."

"Fooled you again." Norway grinned. "You always manage to fall for this."

"It's okay, Denmark." Finland pat his shoulder. "He does this to us all the time."

"Yeah... all the time. ... oh, big brother." Iceland huffed.

Norway turned and hugged him.

"LET GO OF ME!"

"I feel honored."

"I said-"

"Heard you the first time, little brother."

 _Has Norway always been this annoying?_ Sweden wondered. _Oh, well._ He hugged Finland from behind.

His cheeks went red. "Sweden?"

Silence.

Denmark scratched his head. "I have the strangest group of friends..."

Estonia showed up. "Finland! Where's the paperwork?"

"NOOOOOOOO!" Latvia tackled him to the ground. "Don't do it!"

"What paperwork?" Finland wondered.

"You forgot?"

"No, I never knew."

"I sent you a paper in the mail. If you signed it, I would become a Nordic."

"Oh."

"Well?"

"I would never sign that."

Estonia frowned. "Ah? What?"

"YAY!" Latvia squeezed him.

"Get off me."

"Tell that to Norway."

"And Sweden..."

Lithuania sighed. "Estonia doesn't understand, does he?"

"Understand what?"

"The Nordic-Baltic 8?"

"The what?"

"Of course not. You know? That thing you always get invited to but never show up to? Forcing your prime minister to awkwardly attend instead?"

"Hmm?"

"... yeah."

Estonia shrugged.

"Anyways, the lights are nice," Latvia commented.

"Yep." Norway nodded.

"Now get off me," Iceland complained.


	8. RPG Ideas

"Oh! I know what to give everyone for Christmas, Viet!"

"Ah..." She shrugged it off.

"Hey! Don't you want to hear it?" Taiwan pouted.

"... all right." Vietnam put down her paints and looked over at her. "Tell me."

"I'm going to make an RPG with RPG Maker!"

 _I thought she would say_ a racing game _with RPG Maker,_ Vietnam thought with, smiling a little at that and not at Taiwan's idea. "That sounds nice. What will it be about?"

"Hmm... a horror game! Perfect, right?"

 _Taiwan isn't world-renowned for horror... but this might work, either way._ "About what?"

"... hmm... oh! Camping! Gone terribly wrong."

"How wrong?"

"There will be blood."

 _Isn't that the name of one of America's movies?_ "How much?"

"Remember Mad Father?"

She nodded.

"That much blood."

 _I don't remember much blood. There was some on the floor, some on zombies, but I think most of the blood was when you died... no, not really. The screen would go red if it was something that would be real gory, such as Alfred killing Aya with a chainsaw._

 _That would have been interesting to see, Sen, but you probably made the right decision the-_

"HEY!"

"A-ah, sorry," she said quickly, cheeks going red. "I was just thinking about how much blood there wa-"

"TONS!"

"... how many tons?"

"Lots."

"..."

"I'm going to make it right now! Any other ideas?"

"Who will the characters be?"

"... ... ... ... THE CHARACTERS FROM SWORD ART ONLINE!"

 _Really?_ "Well, I wish you luck on that..."

And Taiwan began to make her game... man. That sounds dumb.

* * *

 **Now I want to make a game with RPG Maker. I bought it months ago and still haven't made anything full. Also, these chapters are averaging 300 words or so :P**


	9. Linguophile

"So." England put down his tea. "How have you been?"

"ਨਾਲ ਨਾਲ, ਅਤੇ ਤੁਹਾਨੂੰ?"

"That's good. I've been fine."

"ఒక మంచి విషయం."

"Thank you. Now... I've been dared by the others to come and ask you what you'd like for Christmas."

"عجیب بات ہے، مجھے لگتا ہے."

"Funny does it no justice, India."

"ನಾನು ನೋಡಿ. ಹೇಗಾದರೂ..."

"Ah, right. Umm... what do you want for Christmas?"

"ചോദ്യങ്ങളിൽ എളുപ്പത്തിലുള്ള അല്..."

"Are you trying to be humble, now?"

"त्यो छैन साँच्चै मेरो इरादा थियो..."

"Then speak."

"நீங்கள் இன்னும் நன்றாக என்னை கேட்க முடியும்."

"Sorry. Just, please tell me."

"ईमानदारी से, मैं हमेशा से एक फेरारी... शायद एक एफएफ चाहता था। कुछ तो महंगा नहीं है।."

"An FF? That's an ugly car."

"ঠিক আছে, তাহলে কি সম্পর্কে একটি 512?"

"As in a Testarossa?"

"होय, तंतोतंत."

"I can live with that."

"તમે તેને એક જીવન બદલવા નિર્ણય જેવા ધ્વનિ બનાવે છે."

"Haha, sure. My life will be fine... really."

"ඔබ මට තේරුම් නම් මම බොහෝ විට කල්පනා කරන්න. දැන්, හෝ ඔබ කවදා හෝ ඇත්තටම නම්..."

"What makes you think that? I do understand everything you're saying, for one."

"Then tell me what languages they were in."

"... the last one was Sinhala and the third was Urdu..."

"But you did seem to understand what I was saying, anyways. Sorry if I seem rude."

"For my behavior and tone I must also apologize."

"Damn, aren't you formal?"

"Was I ever not?"

"... I suppose I can't offer an honest answer to that."

"Exactly... so... a Ferrari Testarossa, then?"

"It would be nice. If not, I'd be content with some German chocolate."

England spat out tea and blood. "R-really?"

"हाँ, you know, Ritter and Milka are some of my favorites..."

"I think Milka is Austrian."

"What about Toblerone?"

"Swiss."

"Kvikk Lunsj?"

"Norwegian."

"Stratos?"

"Also Norwegian."

"Mars?"

"Well, that is American, but it's not sold in America..."

"Strange."

"Kinder?"

"Ja, Deutsch." England flushed when he realized what he'd just done. "Excuse me."

"It is all right, England." India smiled. "अपने आप हो, और भाषा में बात करने के लिए डर नहीं है, जैसा कि मुझे क्या करना है।."

"... thanks."

"No problem. Nawr, ydych chi eisiau mwy o de?"

 _Welsh?_ "Sure."

* * *

 **If you can correctly guess the languages in order I will give you virtual hugs and cookies.**


	10. That Damn Julian Calendar

"What are you doing for Christmas, Russia?"

"It's not until January 7th for my sisters and I, dummy!"

"O-oh." Romania blushed. "Okay."

"What about you, silly-head?"

"I might just go annoy the crap out of Bulgaria and Hungary."

"Really? I was planning to do the same! It would have been a lot of fun. Ah, but, you've beaten me to that idea. So I know now what I must do."

"What's that?"

"Spend the days with your brother, Moldova!"

"WHAT?"

"You heard me. Now where is here?"

"I-I don't-"

Russia choked him with his scarf. "Tell me~."

"I-I d-d-donno! I c-can-n-t-t-b-brea..."

"How unfortunate." He threw him to the ground."

"Russia!" Ukraine ran over, timpani drums accompanying her stride. "Don't be so mean!"

"But big sister..."

"But nothing!"

"Heheh, you said 'butt'."

"Russia..."

Belarus shoved Ukraine out of the way. "Добры дзень., big brother..."

"Добрый день. I thought you spoke Russian."

"Трахну рускую мову."

"That's mean."

"So are you. I just want to be together forever, because I love you. Maybe for Christmas we can get married?"

"Don't you know incest is wrong?"

"So is choking innocent people."

"Funny, Belarus.

Funny."

"Is it, now?" Her eyes went red.

"S-sure, w-wait, nope, not anymore?" He shivered and hid behind Ukraine.

"Bela-"

Shoved out of the way again.

"MARRY ME."

"I don't want to..."

"Why not?"

"Incest is wrong!"

"Are we siblings?"

"Yes..."

Belarus's eyes widened. "O-oh."

"You call me big brother every day!"

"Well, it's like that idiot France does, calling himself everyone's."

"That's different..."

"Is it, Russia? Is it?"

"... sure. Anyways, if you stop trying to marry me, I'll give you your Christmas present early."

She dropped everything and put her face in front of his. "Really?"

Nod.

"You got me a present?"

"I always get you one."

"... okay."

 _That was easy._

"Somebody should see if Romania is okay."

"Eh."


	11. BEER!

Austria was just playing some piano when-

"BUTTNUT!" Prussia tackled him to the floor.

"HEY!"

"We were supposed to go Christmas shopping, maybe take a stroll around town, remember?"

"I said, later!"

"You said that hours ago! And yesterday, too!"

"If only you'd take a hint..."

"What do you mean?"

"I don't want to go shopping with you."

"WHAT? WHY NOT?"

"Maybe because, first of all, you're very loud."

"Oh, come on. You can get real loud when you want to."

"Because you annoy the shit out of me, that's why!"

"Aww. I'm sorry."

Austria sighed. "It's okay. I haven't been nice to anyone, lately, really. Christmastime is so stressful..."

"You need to lay back, low, man. How about a beer?"

"Hmm?"

"Have a beer." He popped a bottle open and set it down on his piano.

"What is this scheisse?"

"Jaegermeister."

"Oh. That scheisse."

"SCHEISSE?"

Austria flinched. "Ja. Why not some Rolling Rock, or Guinness? I like Guinness."

"Wow." Prussia shook his head. "I'm disappointed in you."

"Maybe I would have the same taste in music if you kept me in the German Confederation. You weren't 100% German, either."

"Ja, but Poland and the Baltics are cool. Hungary, not so much. Romania is annoying. So are Czech and Slovakia. Too many other ethnic groups in there. Besides, I'm coastal!"

"Barely."

"More coastal than you."

"I had Illyria, once."

"Pfft. Boring."

"Are you saying you were superior because you had a better coast and were more homogenous? That's cold."

"Not as cold as this Jaegermeister will be if I have to shove it down your esophagus!"

"That's... disgusting."

"Just drink it."

"Nein."

"DRINK-"

Germany chopped him.

"Ooh, that smarts!" Prussia fell to the floor.

"Austria? You like Jaegermeister?"

"Nein."

"... we should go shopping for some more beer."

"Christmas-themed beer!" Prussia added with a weak hand in the air.

* * *

 **I suck at this.**

 **Don't expect much of this story anymore. It sucks and doesn't belong on here :P**


	12. Shopping is still fun

"Big brother, I'm going Christmas shopp-"

Switzerland was right next to her, immediately. "Ja?"

"Big brother... I'm buying you something. You can't come."

"Then you're not going."

"Switzerland..."

"Liechtenstein." He stared at her.

"I'm not letting you come."

"Then I'm not letting you go."

She darted out, and he sighed.

* * *

"What to buy, what to buy..." For some reason, she first found herself in the grocery section of their favorite store. "Hmm..."

Cheese. "Perfect. It's on sale, too."

Five francs for the expensive one. "..." She took it. Hopefully Switzerland wouldn't blush when he opened it up.

She found herself buying all the expensive food she could think of. They had money. This wouldn't even put a dent in all they had.

* * *

Switzerland was a bit worried, now.

* * *

She looked at the clothes. They could use some. Even Austria wouldn't wear the same clothes he wore fifty years ago to a UN meeting.

She picked some out for him.

* * *

Worried.

* * *

Finally she was at the gift stuff. "Hmm..."

* * *

Antsy.

"I'm h-"

He ran to the door. "What did you buy?"

"Stuff we needed."

"I smell expensive cold cuts." He looked in the bag.

"H-hey!" She whisked the bags away. "Your Christmas gifts are in there."

"... fine." He crossed his arms and walked away, immediately going to check the bank soon after.


	13. Feelings

**Nyo!s! Yay!**

* * *

Spain plopped down on the bed and let out a yawn. "I'm bored~"

France hummed and looked over at her. "We offered to take you shopping."

"I'm over that."

Prussia sighed and looked down. "We could go to a bar."

"All that'll happen is that men will be cooing over us and shit."

"You can't label all men like that. We could meet someone nice."

"Maybe I want a woman~" France snickered. "More power."

"... strange."

"BASTARDA!" Romano barged in and tackled Spain. "WE WERE SUPPOSED TO GO SHOPPING!"

"Ugh, fuck shopping... I've had too much of it." She groaned and held her hand up to her forehead. "Get me some ibuprofen, please."

"HELL NO!"

France sighed a little. "Romano. Go get her what she asked for."

"Fuck that..."

"Fuck you too."

"AAAH-" She lunged at France, who ducked, and Romano dived into the wall.

"Ouch." Prussia winced. "You people stress me out."

"Not my fault. Not my fault at all-"

"It's never your fault, Spain, now, is it, ever?"

Germany peeked in. "What's all the noise about?"

"I don't know. Ask Romano."

"I need ibuprofen..."

"There. All done." France picked up all the gifts and proceeded to put them under the tree, downstairs.

* * *

"Drinks on me!" Belgium cheered.

"Wicked!" Seychelles raised a glass, Hungary whooped, and Taiwan downed another full stein of vodka.

Vietnam hummed and watched as Monaco took a seat next to him. "Aren't they wild."

"This is nice, you know? It's only at this time of year when we can actually get together and not want to claw at each other's throats."

"It doesn't feel so different to me. Well, it's colder, and that's about it. The temperature is constantly warm at my place."

"I suppose so. But everywhere you go, it's red and green, if not blue."

* * *

Wy stood outside with Liechtenstein.

"This sucks."

* * *

 **This chapter is a subtle nod at my seeming inability to have the chapters have anything to do with Christmas other than a single nod at it. It feels more like a random drabble compilation.**

 **Oh, well. Finals are coming up. Friday, I promise I will try to put out something quality!**

 **XD**


	14. Canti di Natale!

Italy knocked on Germany's door.

"Yes?"

He took in a deep breath and began to sing:

"It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas

Ev'rywhere you go,

Take a look in the five-and-ten, it's glistening once again

With candy canes and silver lanes that glow.

It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas,

Toys in ev'ry store,

But the prettiest sight to see is the holly that will be

On your own front door~"

And that door slammed shut. Italy tilted his head but shrugged it off, figuring the next house would be occupied by someone friendlier.

The next door he knocked on was opened by Belgium.

"Hark how the bells,

Sweet silver bells,

All seem to say,

Throw cares away

Christmas is here,

Bringing good cheer,

To young and old,

Meek and the bold.

Ding dong ding dong

That is their song

With joyful ring

All caroling.

One seems to hear

Words of good cheer

From everywhere

Filling the air.

Oh how they pound,

Raising the sound,

O'er hill and dale,

Telling their tale.

Gaily they ring

While people sing

Songs of good cheer,

Christmas is here.

Merry, Merry, Merry, Merry Christmas,

Merry, Merry, Merry, Merry Christmas.

On on they send,

On without end,

Their joyful tone

To every home.

Ding dong ding dong

Ding dong ding dong~"

By the end, Belgium's eyes were widened and her hands were smacking together. "You're so cute, Italy! And so good at singing!"

"Grazie, Bella!" He embraced her, a feeling she immediately and contently returned.

"Wish me luck at the next house, okay?"

"Of course!" She kissed his forehead.

"Grazie, again!"

Next up was France.

O Holy night, the stars are brightly shining

It is the night of our dear Savior's birth

Long lay the world in sin and error pining

Til He appeared and the soul felt it's worth

A thrill of hope the weary world rejoices

For yonder breaks a new and glorious morn

Fall on your knees

O hear the angel voices

O night divine!

O night when Christ was born

O night divine!

O night, o night divine!"

France pulled him in and invited him to wine and cake. As Italy happily ate without any other thought, France stared into his eyes. "How did you learn to sing so well?"

"The Renaissance! Opera! War!"

"Mm, interesting. ... May I offer you some advice?"

"Sì?"

"Don't move your hands so much. It's a bit weird..."

"Okay! Thanks for the food and drink!" Leaving the glass half full and cake half-eaten, he was off.

France waved and sighed, noting that it was quite lonely some times...

* * *

"Remind me why I agreed to this..."

"It's what brothers do, Romano!"

"Did we need to bring this here jerk bastard, then, too?"

"Why not?"

"His singing his ugly!"

"Hey!" Spain pouted.

"It's the truth." Romano crossed his arms. "Anyways... Okay. Let's go."

Russia opened the door.

"We three kings of Orient are

Bearing gifts we traverse afar (you're too flat).

(Shut up.) Field and fountain, moor and mountain,

Following yonder star.

(Hey!) O star of wonder, (Don't hit me.) star of night,

Star of royal (SHUT UP!)beauty bright,

Westward leading, still proceeding,

Guide us to thy perfect-" Spain and Romano began punching at each other while Italy sang "light~."

Russia clapped. "Best carol I've ever heard."

* * *

 **Now this is a fucking chapter -3-**


	15. Why?

"Hey, Greece!" Turkey ran over and pat his back.

"Oh. Hi."

"Why do you celebrate Christmas on January 7th?"

"Ask Julius Caesar."

"Huh?"

"For a long time, we still used the Julian calendar. It was most commonly seen in Russia. Er, for Orthodox Christians, anyways. Now that everyone uses the Gregorian one, it seems... well... we didn't want to break from tradition. And when we switched, I suppose... Julian December 25th lined up with Gregorian January 7th." He nodded, for some reason.

* * *

"Why do you use Xmas sometimes, Mr. America?"

"Morning to you too, Italy. Well, uh, we like to shorten it that way."

"Isn't that... a bit... umm..."

He stared at him.

"... sacrilegious?"

"Well, no. It's not taking Christ out, it's abbreviating it. X in Greek is 'chi'. And you know the 'Chi Rho', right?" He wrote ΧΡΙΣΤΟΣ and then put the X and P together.

"Oooooooooooooooooooooooooooohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh..."

"Yeah. So it's like that. It's not some secular or anti-theist abbreviation..."

"Thanks for clearing that up!"

"No problem."

* * *

"Germany!"

"Ja?"

"Why do you, like, celebrate Christmas without Santa? Who's this Christkind?"

"He's a little child that brings gifts at Christmas."

"Why don't you use Santa? Santa is cooler!"

"Lutheranism is why. Martin Luther didn't like the saint concept."

"Oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh..."

"Ja."

"I?"

"No, ja."

"'Ja' is 'I'."

"No, 'ja' is 'yes'."

"'Yes' is tak."

"That's in your language."

"Then what is 'I' in yours?"

"'Ich'."

"'Ich' is 'their'. Why are we neighbors?"

"God stuck us together to see if we wouldn't one day rip each other's throats out in anger?"

Poland shivered. "O-okay."

* * *

 **This is harder than it looks. At least my semester finals are over tomorrow. Maybe I'll just do another interesting fact/FAQ chapter XP**


	16. Fool

"You've been Rickrolled!" America laughed and hugged Japan tightly.

"Please let go of me..."

"Why?"

"I hate hugs."

"Why?"

"They're constrictive."

"Why?"

"I'm very close to someone else. We both deserve space."

"Why?"

"Everyone needs air."

"Why?"

"To live."

"Why?"

"Because we're here."

"Why?"

"I don't know."

"Why?"

"I don't know."

"Cool."

* * *

"You've been Rickrolled!" America hugged Germany."

"Oh, great."

"Is that funny?"

"No."

"Why?"

"It's an old joke."

"Why?"

"Fuck."

* * *

 **There's the joke. Fooled you. I'm dumb.**


	17. All these decorations came from Yiwu too

"When I find the bastards that put me on this job... and with you people."

"Fratello! Don't be so mean!"

"Why wouldn't I be? I'm stuck decorating this fucking place a week before Christmas before you shitheads! They're always relegating we Axis Powers to the tough bullshit, those fucking 'United Nations'!" He huffed and slammed a staple into the wall to hold up the last of the lights.

"FRATELLO!" Italy yelled. "Don't be so mean! It's Christmas!"

"It's Advent, dumbass. Advent sucks."

"That's why you should convert to Lutheranism," Germany whistled. "Protest is fun."

"You never converted your brother," Prussia noted with a grin. "You drive me insane, West, with your theses crap." He kept on setting the red, white, and green tablecloths over the meeting table.

"You weren't exactly the most sparking light back then, anyways, East," he huffed with a sigh.

"We can never peacefully resolve our problems," Japan mused with a sigh. "Cheer up, Romano. I made you a bento box."

"Whoop-dee-fucking-doo."

"You made the rest of us ones, too, right?" Italy asked, back to his cheerful self.

"Of course."

"And did you stiff West this time?"

"Of course not. I would never do such a thing."

"You did it before."

"And?"

"..."

"Don't bother, East. Japan always wins arguments. Unless they're with America."

"That's because America always attacks me _ad hominem_."

"Whoa, Japan! You know Grandpa's language?"

"Tokyo University offers that course. At least, they did, once.

Probably."

"FUCK THIS!" Romano kicked the wall.

"Calm down, Romano. We're almost done."

"YOU SAID THAT TEN MINUTES AGO, YOU POTATO BASTARD!" He dove at him with a fist and crashed his head into his steel chest. "OOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW-"

Germany pushed him down to the floor.

Italy was too busy humming along to a song on the radio to notice, at this point.

 _Maybe Italy would like a Michael Jackson record for Christmas,_ Japan conjectured.

Germany had finished putting the last decoration on the last tree in the room and hummed. In no way was he exhausted.

"H-how do you have so much stamina? All you do is eat potatoes and drink beer!" Romano groaned and took another aspirin.

"Military secret," was Germany's only answer.

"Son of a bitch. Stronzo di merda. Figlio de troia..."

"Is it lunch time? Lunch time? I want lunch~" Italy cheered.

"Of course." Japan nodded and headed to the kitchen. "One moment."

Prussia lied down, beat. "I need coffee."

"I have coffee." Austria barged in, holding some tubs of ground coffee beans, from Arabic to Colombian, Hawaiian to Vietnamese."

"YAY!" Italy jumped in joy.

"I brought some wine, too!" Hungary said cheerfully, peeking out from behind Austria's back, holding some old wine bottles.

"And I brought... umm..." Romania wanted to say "slănina afumată", smoked bacon, but he was too busy glaring at Hungary.

"I've got shkembe soup!" Bulgaria announced.

"I already made lunch..." Japan blushed. "Should I put these away for another time?"

"No, no, it's fine... but... Italy!"

"Yes~?"

"Make those four some lunch, too! They deserve it."

"Nein, it's fine," Austria answered quickly.

"Sure?"

"Sure. Now where can I brew this?"

* * *

Japan doled out the bento boxes. "Okay, for Germany, I made some Sauerbraten with Kartoffelklöße dumplings-" - Germany found Japan's correct pronunciations astounding - "- and Knödel. Oh, and of course, potatoes on the side."

"Danke! Danke schön."

"Prussia, I made you some Schweinebraten with pätzle and potatoes on the side."

"DANKE!"

"Italy, I made you spaghetti with meatballs and a slice of pizzòlu..."

"Thank you!"

"And Romano, I made you some Neapolitan pizza and fettucine Alfredo."

"Grazie," he huffed.

Japan sat down with his pad Thai.

What? He felt like trying it for once.

And so they ate that, some bacon and shkembe soup, all while drinking wine and coffee.

Thailand barged in. "I smell pad Thai, and it's not mine, ana~"

So the other five, now, also ate.

* * *

 **There we go. Maybe they'll get even LONGER?**


	18. Company

After the third time lucky pattern of knocking on the door, it was finally opened. An annoyed Belarus opened it and glared at the person standing there. "What do you want?"

"I came to visit you, Belarus."

She slammed the door in America's face. So, naturally, he began to knock again. She opened it once more to growl into his face, asking annoyedly, "The fuck do you want?"

"I wanted to spend time with you. I brought you a small little gift and some treats."

"Treats?"

"Stuff like cookies, chocolate, that sort of thing."

"'A small little gift'?" Belarus looked at his hands. Sure enough, there were a few boxes and bags in them. _How did he knock on the door in the first place?_ "Come in." She stepped out of the way. "How was your trip?"

"Thank you!" He stepped into her warm home, a stark contrast from the walk he took from Minsk International Airport through the snow-capped, propaganda-littered, seemingly gloomy streets of Belarus. It really did deserve the title of "Апошняя дыктатура Еўропы".

"Why did you visit now, of all times?"

"We celebrate Christmas on different days, so-"

"So?"

"So I wanted to visit you a little earlier, you know?"

"I'll be at the _Roman Catholic_ Christmas party anyways. It would be a waste of human - national - resources, after all." She'd heard from Russia how nicely the meeting room was decorated.

"Even so. Where may I set these down?"

"The dining table, right there."

"Thank you."

"Yeah."

He set the stuff down on the table and hummed contentedly, a bit proud of himself.

"So-"

"So?"

"Yeah, so."

Belarus shook her head and walked over to the table. "About that gift..."

"Would you like it now?"

"Sure."

He handed it to her. She took it quickly and opened it carefully to pull out...

... a chess set with her national colors and flag's pattern on it. Her eyes began to twinkle, seemingly against her wishes.

"What's this? Why are you giving me this?"

"It's a chess set."

"..."

"I know you're really good at it."

"Did you... did you make this yourself?" Her eyes continued twinkling.

"Yep. Out of wood. Took me eight hours, total, listening to nothing but 80's music." What a trip _that_ was.

She stood there, hands trembling slightly, looking down, her eyes invisible behind her long, flowing hair. She mouthed something: "... Дзякуй."

"Hmm?"

"Дзякуй, дзякуй, вялікі дзякуй." She looked up at him. "I love it. ... wow. I've only ever said that when... Big Brother, he gave me my bow."

"... you like it that much?" He expected her to be pulling his leg.

"I like it this much." Belarus ran into her room and came back with some fake mistletoe. She proceeded to fling it at America's face.

"Thanks, it means a lot, that you like it..."

"Shut up and let's have some hot chocolate and 'treats'."

* * *

Prussia barged in, a bit drunk. Just a little bit. Not a lot. Just a little bit.

"What is fucking up?"

Hungary was sitting on the couch, playing _A Link to the Past_ on Super Nintendo. "The ceiling," she answered, before he plopped on top of her, smiling goofily.

"Hey!" She steamed and began to whack him with her frying pan, to no avail.

"Oww..."

"Sorry... but... are you drunk?"

"Fuck you."

"Oh, you're drunk." She sighed and rubbed his back. "Where have you been?"

"I was partying with Poland... and Lithuania. They were celebrating that today is the Fourth Sunday of Advent, and in a week it will be Christmas. What a bunch of fungi."

"Fun guys?"

"Yeah, fungi."

"Lovely." She sighed and rested her head on his shoulder, still patting and rubbing his back. "I'm a little tired, too. Do you want me to carry you to bed?"

"Sure."

She lifted him up and over his head, shooting his heart rate up.

"H-hey! Put me down!"

She threw him onto the bed and plopped down next to him.

"Geez..."

"Let me sing you a song to help you sleep, eh?"

"As long as it isn't something scary..."

"I promise it's not."

"Okay..."

"Egy, kettő, három, négy,

Kicsi kutya hóva mégy?

Kop, kop, kopogok,

Ovodába indulok."

"You have a cute singing voice."

"I know." She blushed and giggled. "A juhásznak jól megy dolga:

egyik dombról a másikra

terelgeti nyáját,

fújja furulyáját,

bú nélkül éli világát."

"... wait. Are you saying that I'm a shepherd dog?"

"That's a far-fetched interpretation of that. Would you rather I read to you from the Bible?"

"Sure. Read to me... about Jesus' birth, and stuff like that."

She began to look for "stuff like that" in her Bible. She began to read: "Felment József is a galileai Názáretből Júdeába, Dávid városába, amelyet Betlehemnek neveznek, mert Dávid házából és nemzetségéből származott,

hogy összeírják jegyesével, Máriával együtt, aki áldott állapotban volt.

És történt, hogy amíg ott voltak, eljött szülésének ideje,

és megszülte elsőszülött fiát. Bepólyálta, és a jászolba fektette, mivel a szálláson nem volt számukra hely.

Pásztorok tanyáztak azon a vidéken a szabad ég alatt, és őrködtek éjszaka a nyájuk mellett.

És az Úr angyala megjelent nekik, körülragyogta őket az Úr dicsősége, és nagy félelem vett erőt rajtuk.

Az angyal pedig ezt mondta nekik:

Ne féljetek,

mert íme, nagy örömet hirdetek nektek,

amely az egész nép öröme lesz:

üdvözítő született ma nektek,

aki az Úr Krisztus, a Dávid városában.

A jel pedig ez lesz számotokra: találtok egy kisgyermeket, aki bepólyálva fekszik a jászolban.

És hirtelen mennyei seregek sokasága jelent meg az angyallal, akik dicsérték az Istent, és ezt mondták:

Dicsőség a magasságban Istennek,

és a földön békesség,

és az emberekhez jóakarat.

Miután elmentek tőlük az angyalok a mennybe, a pásztorok így szóltak egymáshoz: Menjünk el Betlehembe, és nézzük meg azt, ami ott történt, amit az Úr tudtunkra adott.

Elmentek tehát sietve, és megtalálták Máriát, Józsefet és a jászolban fekvő kisgyermeket.

Amikor meglátták őt, elmondták mindazt, amit erről a kisgyermekről az angyalok hirdettek,

és mindenki, aki hallotta, elcsodálkozott azon, amit a pásztorok mondtak nekik. Mária pedig mindezeket a beszédeket megjegyezte, és szívében forgatta.

A pásztorok pedig visszatértek, dicsőítve és magasztalva Istent mindazért, amit hallottak és láttak, úgy, ahogyan ő megüzente nekik."

By the time she was done with that, Prussia was asleep.

* * *

 **Yay. Ships. And Bible readings in Hungarian. The first part is about Joseph and Mary going to Galilee for the census, and after that, if you've watched A Charlie Brown Christmas, it is what Linus explained was the true meaning of Christmas.**


	19. Viking names for end tables and sofas

"All right! I am sure you are all wondering why I've called this emergency meeting of the Nordics!"

"Because you want free drinks and an excuse to annoy the shit out of us with your voice."

Denmark looked down, dejected. "You're so mean to me, Norway."

"And you wonder why."

"We do, Norway." Finland tilted his head and sighed. "You don't have to be."

"But I can."

"So you choose to?"

"Yeah."

"Why?"

"Why not?"

"Talking to you is worse than talking to a brick wall," Iceland huffed.

Norway shrugged. "Little brothers are always negative, like that."

 ** _"I'M_** **negative?"** he shouted.

"Quiet down."

His red face was steaming at this point. "Just tell us why we're here, Finland."

"What? But Denmark was the one who called this."

"I'd rather hear you speak than him."

"I don't care. We're here to coordinate on our Christmas presents!"

"Why?"

"We can't have one of the other nations receiving five of the same loveseats. Or two nations receiving the same one. We need to be original, entirely, in what we give everyone."

"... fantastic."

* * *

"America gets a Kivik, Canada gets a Vallentuna, Cuba a Norsborg... England a Knopparp, France a Soederhamn, Spain a Nockeby, Portugal a Stocksund, Netherlands a Tidafors, Belgium a Knislinge, Luxembourg a Stockholm, Germany a Muren, Switzerland a Jennylund, Liechtenstein a Tullsta, Austria a Strandmon, Hungary an Ekenaes, Poland an Ekeroe, Czech a Nolmyra, Slovakia a Mellby, Belarus a Pello, Ukraine a Skogaby, Russia a Landskrona, Lithuania a Dagstorp..."

Norway plopped down to the floor, passed out from boredom.

* * *

 **I got bored, too.**


	20. It's Xtreme

"Well, today begins the season of winter." Canada smiled as he sat back and sipped some hot chocolate.

"Shouldn't we be seeing snow by now?" America appeared antsy, looking through all the windows.

"Calm down, bro... it's only 3 Celsius at the moment."

"Give me Fahrenheit!"

"37."

"Aww." He moped and lied down, resting his head on his hands. "When will it go below?"

"Not until... about six PM, or so. Even then, there's barely a chance of snow until tomorrow..."

"Why did I even visit you?"

"You do realize it's snowing in Quebec, right?"

"OH, REALLY?" America's eyes twinkled. "LET'S GO!" He dragged Canada outside and to his car.

"Waaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhh~"

* * *

Canada lied down and closed his eyes. He moved his arms and legs side to side and back to make a snow angel. It didn't last long, though, because America dumped a load of snow onto him.

"Hey..."

"We're going go have a good old snowball fight, okay?"

"Oh... okay..." He stood up and began to make a fort. Next time he looked up, there was a large, menacing wall in front of him.

"FIRE!" America began shooting snow pellets at Canada with a snow turret.

"The fuck?!" He jumped and ran behind his fort, which did well to absorb the rounds.

"HAHAHHAAHHAHAHAH!"

 _This is what I get for having an engineer for a brother._ He sighed and began to throw snowballs at the wall. The trajectory was "suck".

Eventually the turret stopped firing. Canada looked up and was smacked in the face with a snow rocket. It blew ice particles and such all over the place.

Silence.

"... bro?" America peeked his head out from behind the sight and shield of the snow-made rocket launcher. "... ... bro." He jumped out from behind his wall and looked for him.

"You find the only way to make games unfun, though, bro." Canada wiped some more blood from his forehead and stood up.

"Dude! You are sick! Sick, man! Even Russia bows down to the power of my snowzooka!"

"Cool." He coughed up some ice and snow and water and shit and limped back to the car.

* * *

 **Fuck this.**


	21. Third time I forgot to upload a chapter

"Well, today begins the season of winter." Canada smiled as he sat back and sipped some hot chocolate.

"Shouldn't we be seeing snow by now?" America appeared antsy, looking through all the windows.

"Calm down, bro... it's only 3 Celsius at the moment."

"Give me Fahrenheit!"

"37."

"Aww." He moped and lied down, resting his head on his hands. "When will it go below?"

"Not until... about six PM, or so. Even then, there's barely a chance of snow until tomorrow..."

"Why did I even visit you?"

"You do realize it's snowing in Quebec, right?"

"OH, REALLY?" America's eyes twinkled. "LET'S GO!" He dragged Canada outside and to his car.

"Waaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhh~"

* * *

Canada lied down and closed his eyes. He moved his arms and legs side to side and back to make a snow angel. It didn't last long, though, because America dumped a load of snow onto him.

"Hey..."

"We're going go have a good old snowball fight, okay?"

"Oh... okay..." He stood up and began to make a fort. Next time he looked up, there was a large, menacing wall in front of him.

"FIRE!" America began shooting snow pellets at Canada with a snow turret.

"The fuck?!" He jumped and ran behind his fort, which did well to absorb the rounds.

"HAHAHHAAHHAHAHAH!"

 _This is what I get for having an engineer for a brother._ He sighed and began to throw snowballs at the wall. The trajectory was "suck".

Eventually the turret stopped firing. Canada looked up and was smacked in the face with a snow rocket. It blew ice particles and such all over the place.

Silence.

"... bro?" America peeked his head out from behind the sight and shield of the snow-made rocket launcher. "... ... bro." He jumped out from behind his wall and looked for him.

"You find the only way to make games unfun, though, bro." Canada wiped some more blood from his forehead and stood up.

"Dude! You are sick! Sick, man! Even Russia bows down to the power of my snowzooka!"

"Cool." He coughed up some ice and snow and water and shit and limped back to the car.

* * *

 **Fuck this.**


	22. Bet

"Mr. Egypt, how do you celebrate Christmas?"

Silence.

India tilted his head.

Silence.

"..."

"Well... you know how Russia celebrates on January 7th?"

"Yeah?"

"We celebrate it on the same day. Well, at least, the Coptic Christians do. It's a bit conservative."

"How so?"

"There aren't really many decorations or festivities... the people just go to mass, give gifts, maybe have some dinner together..."

"Why's that?"

"I'm Muslim...? And so is 90% of my population. Only 10% are Christians."

"Oh. Well, only 2.3% of mine is-"

"That's about 9 million people compared to just under 30 million."

"... true."

"What do you do?"

"Well, my Christians, at least, they do the normal stuff that England does..."

"And that is?"

"Tonnes of mutton and Christmas cake and decorations and carols all around."

 _Bollywood must be jealous._

"What are we talking about?" Seychelles ran over.

"Christmas in our countries."

"Oh! Ours aren't so different, right?"

"What makes you say that?"

"It's super hot!"

"... true."

Norway glanced over at the three conversing and sipped his coffee. "How can they stand to celebrate Christmas like that?" he muttered to himself. Seychelles heard him anyways and stomped over. "What did you say?"

"Nothing."

"You think just because the difference between our average temperatures at this time of year is 30 C, that you are better at celebrating Christmas?"

"I never said-"

"You're on!"

"For wh-"

"How much are you betting?"

"I'm n-"

"A million Seychellois rupees it is!" Maybe if she knew that one Seychellois rupee equalled 0.66 Norwegian krone, which equaled 0.07 Euros, which meant one million rupees was only 70,000 Euros...

How do all these nations do their mental math so quickly and effectively?

"..." He sighed and facepalmed.

"Giving up already?"

"Hell, no." He walked away. "It'll just be too easy to win this."

"We'll see!" She turned back to Egypt and India. "You guys are going to help me, right?"

"..."

"..."

"..."

"Of course!"

"... sure."

"Thanks, guys!" She hugged them both.

"D-don't do that... only one person can hug me and she's not you..."

"Are you sure? This feels nice."

"... nope."

* * *

"Japan! Japan!" South Korea tackled him to the floor.

"What do you want?" He pushed him off and stood up.

"You didn't forget about me this year, did you?"

"We never do."

"There are only three days to Christmas and I've only just arrived!"

Not my fault.

"That doesn't mean we forgot you."

"But why didn't you say something sooner, huh? Huh? Huh?

... huh?"

"Well, lucky you didn't have to help out with decorations, or anything."

"Oh, sweet! Hey, where's China?"

"He's with Italy and Romano. I think he's taking a look at their pizza recipes so he can bootleg them and make cheaper, shoddy ones for Christmas. That, or he's actually learning how to make some for once."

"Probably the latter... so, what did you say about decorations?"

"We have the UN headquarters all set up for the [Western] Christmas party."

"Oh! Sick! Will the cute girls be there!"

"Yes, but they have names, and..."

"And what?"

"Just don't do anything stupid this time."

 _"Whoa, these feel so-"_

 _Hungary smacked him and threw him out the window. At least it didn't break again, since France had already flung England out the same one minutes before._

"... oh. Okay!"

* * *

 _ **And here you can still see the author's slow descent into insanity.**_

 **I really had to question whether or not I should have included that flashback.**

 **And what really is the point of this story's existence?**

 **... fuck. I should have been taking suggestions and such. You know?**


	23. Maniac

**Today is the 24th. I suck at this. This whole story is a disaster. And now I have TWO DAYS to redeem myself! Can I do it?**

* * *

"We think you can!" America smiled and waved.

Thanks.

* * *

 **Maybe I'll fix this chapter later. Onto Christmas Eve!**


	24. Eve, Reprise

"Maniac" played in the United Nations headquarters. Just as always, America was the first one at the meeting place for the Christmas place.

"It can cut you like a knife"

He made sure that all the dinner platters and such were all ready.

"And she's dancing-" Wait a minute. The guidelines say we can't use lyrics... oh, well.

He just hummed along, wondering where Canada could have been. When the doors opened, America turned his head, expecting Canada but receiving Russia, Belarus, Ukraine, Estonia, Latvia, Lithuania, and Moldova. Why the first three and last one were there at this party was beyond wonder-

"Oh, hey guys! Russia, don't your sisters and you celebrate on January 7th?"

"Yes, but we did once celebrate it on December 25th... and it would be a waste if we didn't come to this party, right?"

"Y-yeah..." Lithuania looked up, away from Russia.

"Take On Me" was playing now.

"Some Christmas music," Belarus muttered, Estonia agreeing.

"I like it."

Everyone's heads turned to see Norway leading the rest of the Nordics in.

"Hey, guys!"

"God dag."

"God dag."

"God dag."

"Góðan dag."

"Hyvää iltapäivää!"

"It's still morning."

"Time zones, you know? Hyvää päivää!"

"Still the alien, aren't you?" Russia grinned and pat his back.

"Sure." Finland's face went purple in defeat.

"Head päeva, Finny!" Estonia pat his back also, to reassure him. "Speaking of which, remember what I said, about my Christmas gift?"

"I think you don't."

"The Nordic-Baltic 8," Latvia reminded him.

"Dumbass." Lithuania shook his head.

Finland took his list out and put Lithuania's name underneath Belarus's.

"Hey."

"Why am I so low on that list? Belarus growled at Finland.

"Do that to me and your name will be written on the bottom, and I will defecate into your stocking."

"Ew." America shuddered.

"AND YOUR NAME WILL BE WRITTEN IN BLOOD ON YOUR EPITATH."

"Calm down, sister..." Ukraine put her arm at Belarus's side, shielding Finland from her. "He's just doing his job."

"Right, and Ukraine, you're at the very top, you know?"

"Wow..." She beamed. "Thank you, Finland!"

"Thank you for being so kind this year."

"Where am I, Finland?" America glanced at his list and found his name in the fourth spot, underneath Italy's and New Zealand's. His head went up again when Canada entered, capped in snow.

"God dag, Canada." Denmark grinned and waved.

"What's up?"

"The ceiling. OH! SEE? I can kick ass at good jokes, too!" The Dane fisted the air.

In the meantime, Belarus was eyeing the shit on the table. Everything imaginable was there, all the different foods from the nations, everything from _ugh, sliders_ to _ooh, cepelinai_ to _wow, spaghetti_ to _no shit, sausages_ to _holy motherfuck, chicken tikka masala!_ She looked over at the others and back at the table. There was chicken, turkey, pork, mutton, Spam... _Spam?_ Huge bowls of salad and bread...

And that dessert table. Cakes, cookies, ice cream, Maltesers... _England can make edible chocolate? That's a new one._

Romania and Hungary strolled in. Strolling in equals rolling in, exchanging blows and bites and such.

"Whoa, whoa, guys, calm down!" Estonia dived in to try and break them up while Finland amended his list for the 506th time that morning. It would soon be the first of the afternoon, before sunset.

Moldova eventually managed to drag Romania out of it just as Germany and Prussia entered. The latter picked Hungary up and carried her to safety

"FROELICHE WEILNACHTEN!" Germany boomed to quiet everyone down.

"Calm down, Germany," Canada sighed.

"Danke schoen." He sighed and went to have a seat.

"Put me down." Hungary squeezed Prussia's cheek.

"Of course, my awesome lady." He put her down in the seat next to Germany and sat next to her. "America! I love how you touched the place up before the party. Didn't we do an awesome job, too?"

"Yeah, man! I hope you all still like it!"

"It looks better," Germany admitted. "Did Canada help?"

"I was looking for Kumario Nintendo... I think he ran away because I threatened to not get him anything for Christmas if he kept cursing at me..."

"I thought Tony was the cusser."

"Tony can hold Kumansa Musa's drink."

"Lovely."

Cuba walked in and immediately glared at Canada. "Dammit, America, I knew you'd be here before me! You hijo de puta!"

"I-I'm Canada..."

"MI CULO!" He was about to hit him before Vietnam appeared and stopped his arm. "That's Canada."

"Oh." He flushed and looked away. "Sorry."

"I-it's okay... again." Canada looked to the side and saw Thailand and Taiwan walk in.

"สวัสดีอานา~"

"下午好！"

China ran in and tackled Taiwan to the ground. "Mine! You are all mine!"

She groaned and rolled her eyes.

Japan walked in and stared at the two. "Having a moment?"

"Sure."

South Korea bounded in afterwards. "In comes the origin of Christmas!"

"JAPAN! Why did you let him come this time?"

Japan shrugged.

"Fuck you," Korea spit at China.

"We don't need that." Finland changed his list for the tenth time that afternoon.

Belarus and Norway were standing in front of all the tables lined with food, just staring. Sweden joined them, letting out an "Ahem."

Italy, Romano, and Spain ran in. "HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!"

"Hej!" Finland waved at them.

"¡FELIZ NAVIDAD~!"

"Buon"

"NATALE~!"

Portugal strolled in and waved at everyone. People were settling down, just waiting, at this point.

France and Monaco slid in, Austria, Czech, and Slovakia coming behind them. Everybody was just waving at them, just as good old friends did.

"Celebration" was playing. "How romantic," France muttered.

"Where is the Piano Concerto No. 24 in C minor?" Austria huffed.

Poland twirled his way in. "Wesołych Świąt!"

Switzerland and Liechtenstein stealthily made their way in and sat in the corner at the far end of the room.

Greece and Turkey were also fighting each other, pulling at hair and limbs and such, as they rolled inside.

India and Seychelles walked in. The latter immediately spotted Norway and tried to remember... what her beef with him was from the other day... _Oh, well._ The former had also forgotten.

"We made it!" Belgium plopped down, tired after the long walk. Luxembourg fell on top of his sister, but not Netherlands on top of his brother. He was just too fast and had too much stamina.

Egypt and Cameroon entered, too, but nobody noticed.

Australia and New Zealand were the last ones in. Not surprising.

"ARE WE ALL HAVING A GOOD TIME?" America bellowed into the mic. A roar answered his question. Drinks clanked everywhere.

* * *

 **MIGHT THIS BE UPDATED AGAIN, LATER? OR WILL TOMORROW'S CHAPTER PICK UP WHERE THIS LEFT OFF AND END WITH CHRISTMAS DAY CELEBRATIONS INTO THE MORNING? FINE OUT, SAME HETA-TIME, SAME HETA-CHANNEL!**

 _ **More and more insane he becomes.**_


	25. Berry Mistmas, Charlie Chown

"Hark! The herald-angels sing

'Glory to the newborn king;

Peace on earth and mercy mild,

God and sinners reconciled'

Joyful all ye nations rise,

Join the triumph of the skies

With the angelic host proclaim

'Christ is born in Bethlehem'

Hark! The herald-angels sing

'Glory to the new-born king'"

"Whom are we singing of, again?" Japan wondered.

"Jesus."

"Oh. Right. He was a king?"

"It's a long story."

"Oh."

"It probably wouldn't interest you."

Gifts were exchanged here and there, but Finland was just freely throwing some at people. Everyone was happy.

And stuffed with food.

And then most of them went to Mass.

* * *

 **Should be the end. It's a day to rest, go to Mass, spend time with family... thanks for reading this whole thing. I hope it was worth it and gave you laughs, whether it be my actual ability at comedy or lack thereof/of writing skill. God bless us everyone!**


End file.
